Day 33
Patanjali said that there can be only four types of people in the world - people who are happy, those who are unhappy, those engaged in good and meritorious acts, and those engaged in bad and demonic acts. Happy people, unhappy people, meritorious and blessed people and sinful people - the four categories. And how do you deal with them?
Patanjali said to have maitri - friendliness with all those who are happy. If you do not, you will be jealous. You are jealous of people who are happier than you. But if you feel that you own them and that they belong to you, it does not bother you when they are very happy. You are never jealous about the happiness of someone very close and dear to you.
The jealousy arises when the happy person is not connected to you totally. So, Patanjali said that you should be friendly with them. You can see the same Self in everybody but the feelings will not be the same. It can differ for a beginner. You do not feel identified with everybody, though intellectually you may feel that it is only you who is in the other person, but your feelings still have their preferences since they are not fully cultured and established in the Self.
Then, what preference will you have? Be friendly with those who are happy. If you are friendly with unhappy people, you too become unhappy. So Patanjali said that we should not be friendly with unhappy people. But we should be compassionate to them.
The second bhava which Patanjali has given is karuna. Have sympathy and compassion for people who are suffering.
But do not be friendly with them because this friendship will drag you down and make you unhappy, too. If you are unhappy and they are also unhappy, then you will not be able to help them. You may think that you should share the unhappiness of your friend. But then, you will not be able to share your happiness with them. So, you should not be friendly with unhappy people, but should be compassionate to them. There is a difference here.
Be compassionate to them. Karuna is compassion. We do not know how to deal with people who are suffering. We make their beliefs stronger that God had been unjust with them, and that they are suffering. Saying this, we push them lower down the drain. Actually, we have been trying to pull them out. Instead, we do opposite. We do this unconsciously.
We should not pity people who are suffering. There is much difference between pity and compassion. When we pity, we are not pulling a person up. We are pushing them further down. Most of the people do this. With their pity, they make the belief of the suffering person more concrete about his sorrow in whatever limited logic of relative existence.
If someone thinks that a great injustice has been done to them and they are miserable and on a self-pitying trip, we do not help them in any way if we pity them. They will have a confirmation that they are suffering. We will not help them in any way to wake up to the truth. We should have compassion for people who are suffering but not friendliness.
Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankarji
PATANJALI YOGA SUTRAS