Once a A Swami went and stayed as a guest in an elderly gentleman's home in Kanpur. Since the son and his wife both worked outside the home, this elderly man did all the household chores like sweeping and looking after the children.
When the son returned home in the evening, he would scold his father, and once even slapped him in front of the Swami.
The Swami felt pity for the elderly man and asked him, “Why do you struggle so much? I feel bad for you. Come stay at my ashram where I'll look after you and you'll live comfortably”.
“At this age, after having lived 70 years, why do you stay with your son who abuses you? Why lead such a life? Please, come."
The old man, who until this point had been pouring out his sorrows, suddenly became enraged and said to the Swami, "Did you not have any other home to break apart? Why did you come only to my house?”.
“Go find some other house to ruin. If I leave the house, what will happen to the children? What will happen to the grandchildren? My son and daughter-in-law work outside of the house”.
“Who will feed the grandchildren? Who will sweep and clean the house? Please, do not ruin this house and leave”. Shocked, the Swami wondered, "What is this?" Out of compassion I offered him a place to stay, feeling that he is such an elderly man who struggles so hard.
“I didn't want him to live in such conditions and offered him a better life, but he turned against me”. This is attachment. Even after being kicked around, you stay somewhere because of attachment.
Even if it means dying, you stay there. There are some who refuse to leave their old house and move to a new home. They say, “Even if I die, I will not leave this place or this village”.
Such attachment for a place and for people. If attachment stays within limits, it will bring success. But if the same attachment exceeds its limits, it brings misery.
With victory over attachment, you find unlimited enjoyment, naturalness automatically arises in you, and you can succeed in any work.
There is no use getting entangled in the abilities and successes you gain after winning over attachment.
So you achieved some success - say you became an expert veena player.
If you hold onto the thought that nobody plays the veena better than I do, your ego gets bigger, and when you meet someone who plays the veena better than you, jealousy starts.
Your calm poise and cheerfulness vanish. When you see someone close to you talk with someone else and smile at him. Your stomach churns because you feel that he should speak only to you and to no one else.
A newly-wed couple keeps a close eye on each other just like a good watch-dog guards the house. They observe whether the other is looking at someone else or not.
The way they keep an eye on each other, even dogs do not keep such close watch. What do they keep an eye on? If one smiles at someone else, the other suspects he is thinking about that person.
They wonder whether their mind is being distracted, and they try to bind each others' mind. You cannot even control your own mind. Why do you try to control the mind of others?
When you win victory over attachment, you find unlimited enjoyment. The satisfaction that we feel when you accomplish something through attachment is very little.
Your happiness and your consciousness are unlimited. To enjoy such vast happiness, you need to escape from attachment, let go of small pleasures.
If you do not rise above attachment, the small mind will only think, "What about me, my son, my daughter, my mind." Just as your children belong to you, your neighbours' children also belong to you.
“Everyone belongs to me” you can win over attachment only when this feeling dawns in you. Many times you have heard people advising detachment. Everyone, even sadhus, recommend finding freedom from attachment.
Many people become sannyasi, renunciates, out of fear of attachment. They leave everything and run away, imagining that they can escape attachment.
Although they leave home, they become attached to their possessions - their water-pot, saffron robes, images of devotion, danda stick, etc.
If someone touches or takes their staff, they get upset and shout. Then they become angry and hurl abuses at others. People tremble in fear of Gurus because of their harsh words.
It's commonly said, "One should feel fear and devotion for an elder." Either you are afraid of him or you have devotion for him. There can be either light or darkness.
Just as light and darkness cannot be present together, fear and devotion cannot exist together. How can there be fear when there is devotion? We say "fear and devotion" only as a figure of speech.
To find greater happiness and unlimited enjoyment, you need to rise above small pleasures. If you drown in them, there is no use.
The happiness or achievement you get out of attachment is limited, and what is limited comes with a tail, that tail is unhappiness.
You cannot make anything with only pure gold. You have to mix it with some other material in order to make jewelry and ornaments.
Similarly, a small amount of unhappiness is mixed in with all your happiness. But if you win
over attachment, you can have unlimited pleasure and the endless experience of the self.
