Q: Gurudev I see people look so happy even without doing yoga. Is it my illusion or is it their past life merits?
Why do you bother about others? You look into yourself. If you can be happy without anything, be happy and if you need to do whatever you need to do to be happy then do that.
This analysis will not lead you to anywhere. Yes! Many people could be happy with their merits. Some may look happy but may not be really happy. Some are happy but may not appear to be happy. What is the point of you doing any research on it? If it is for any benefit then I am ok with that also. At least you be happy and do what you want to do.
Q: Guruji! I used to get into bliss every time I used to meditate. After marriage and kids, it is not happening. What really went wrong?
Look! Do not blame marriage for this. There are people who are married and happy and there are people who are single and unhappy. Yes! There are responsibilities, challenges. In spite of all these responsibilities, you should take some time. And a baby is not active all the time. In fact, small babies sleep most of the time. When they sleep, you meditate. Who can stop?
Q: Why is the tradition in India that woman has to go to stranger’s house and take care of his parents and not hers. This keeps bothering me.
Well you should have been born in Kerala or Tripura where there is a patriarchal society. But if the same question your husband ask you then why should I leave my house and go and stay in my wife's house and take care of her parents? My dear! If you can take care of your people, you can take care of others also. Perhaps it is easier to take care of stranger than your own people.
Q: Life is wonderful and this world is amazing but sometimes I feel all this is pointless. This feeling keeps coming back. What should I do?
Very Good! You are getting matured. You are getting dispassionate about everything. And when you see everything is pointless, this should give you more joy, not depression. If you see everything is pointless and still you are happy and you want to continue doing it, then you are on the right track.
Games are always pointless but games are played because games give you joy. What is the point of a man playing a ball and hitting it by bat here and there and wait for someone to throw again? Totally pointless. Waste of time. Here I totally agree with Bernard Shaw who says that Cricket is a game where eleven fools play and eleven thousand watches. Any game you take it. Watching any movie is even pointless. If you see in that angle, all games are pointless but we still play. Right! Life is also called a Leela! Ramleela is a game. Krishna Leela is a game and your Leela is a game.
Q: In deep gratitude Gurudev! Just want to know what I can do for you?
I think you should keep this question and time to time you get different ideas for all that. Do seva, do sadhana, do satsang and work for all the projects. There are so many projects in Art of Living. We need many more such places where people can come and experience bliss and joy. We need lighthouses of happiness. You can create. You can be in the team. You can promote our books, tapes and knowledge and products you can promote them. In any way, you serve our society our world. Plant more trees, be part of river rejuvenation programs. Yuvacharya, village programs. If you want to do, there are so many projects. Think about it.
Become a teacher, plan to be a teacher and if you are already a teacher then teach courses. At least once in a month.
Q: While decision making, when to use our heart and when to use our brains?
I think you should use both. Sometimes it could be a cocktail. You cannot really bifurcate as young children. In adults, it’s a different case but as a kid in you, it is a mixer.
Q: Is it ok to be emotionally dependent on someone?
As a teenager, you should not think about emotional dependency. Both will put you in problem. If you think you are emotionally independent then it is not true because you are dependent on your parents, your friends. In this, if you try to be independent then you will come out to be a rebellious and arrogant person. On the other hand, if you think you are emotionally dependent on everybody then you become too mushy-mushy and at the drop of a head you start crying and throwing tantrums and all unnecessary and unfruitful drama will happen which nobody will like to watch. So teenage is the age when you are just developing your emotions. This is a time to focus on your studies and develop skills.
Q: Gurudev, if someone uses bad language or abuses me, I get depressed very easily and sometimes I also think of committing suicide. How can I overcome this?
Absolutely not. Promise me you will never even move in that direction. You have brilliant future. You have the whole nation. You have so much to work on this planet. How can you even think of these small pity things? Even if you fail in your exams, never think of that. Let everyone humiliate you. You know God is with you. Your Gurudev is with you. So many friends and your parents are with you. You should never make your parents cry.
I promise all your difficulties will simply go away. Don't worry.
I know you have to go through tough times. Humiliation is needed for blossoming. A small rose flower, you put gobar (cow dung) which smells bad, you put manure which does not look nice. But you put foul smell to a plant and fragrance comes out of it. So in your life little humiliation, little difficulties, little failure are like manure. And you come out like most beautiful, most fragrant Rose.
Never mind people insulting you. Every Insult is like manure for young people to grow. Think this way and you will find really you will grow.
Q: Why do parents love the younger one more?
Because they need little more attention. They had loved you when you were young too. You should know.
You are able to walk and younger one need little more care and support. When you are not well, they take care of you one hundred percent. So you do not know their love. It is equal to both of you. I tell you they love you both the same. There is a difference in love and attention. Love is same for all but attention; if someone needs it then he gets it. Attention is time and situation bound but love is beyond that.
Q: How do I handle my fear of exams, people and failure?
Failure in exam. Never mind. If you fail in exam. So what. It is only by chance people fail. There are many great achievers on the planet who have failed many times. A great physicist failed in physics in his class many times. So don't be upset if you happened to be failed. It gives you a chance to study your subject in more depth and with more attention. Take it that way. Don't worry about people. Meditation and Yoga will help. You are one of the parts of people.
Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar